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That’s not to say that anonymous sex is inherently wrong, it’s merely an observation I have made, and one which has greater implications for our gay youth than any other demographic.
Sex education in schools is, at best, perfunctory, and for gay kids it’s largely non-existent.
Although gay dating sites provide a useful platform in allowing men to meet each other, Christopher Halton writes for Pink News of how they can also put some gay men at risk.
On Monday, I was one of 30 or so men to take part in the filming of an advert for Survivors UK, a lottery funded charity set up to support men who have been raped or sexually abused.
Whilst sex should be fun and experimentation should be promoted in order that we can all have fulfilling and liberated sexual lives, simply using each other as receptacles for penises totally negates the emotional and psychological aspects of healthy sexuality.
More pertinently, the most vulnerable individuals on these sites, the young, inexperienced men who really need positive sexual role-models are being taught that in order to receive the attention and intimacy they crave, they must allow themselves to be used as sex objects.
If any of these men had been abusive or put pressure on me to do things I wasn’t comfortable doing, I could well have found myself going along with them.
They are risking both their physical and mental health, and they are willing to do it because they crave the love, acceptance and security they haven’t found at home, in their communities or within the educational system.
It was the first geosocial networking based site and as such, it made the gay-dating game mobile in a way which no other site had achieved before.
It allowed men to identify and meet other men wherever they were, and therefore, implicitly at least, it promoted sex-on-the-go for which there is considerable demand.
Anyone who has spent time on Grindr or Gaydar will know that it is common to receive sexually aggressive messages accompanied by photographs of the sender in provocative poses, often naked.
Sometimes, the only photographic evidence of themselves they wish to send are close-up shots of their penises.
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As a user of gay dating sites, this made me think about the danger inherent in meeting men who I know nothing about, other than what they choose to tell me, which may or may not be true.